Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
I'm 80% sure I have pink eye. This is my penance for being a homewrecker.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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