At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Just went over my top ten highlight reel with that guy I'm fucking. It was like we were sports announcers. But about sex.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
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