Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I think he's holding my wallet hostage because I puked in his car. It's not my fault he has child locks on his windows..
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
Trying to stay sober at a family function but hiccuping so fucking loud. "Have you been drinking?" I hit on my cousin so yeah. I have been drinking.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
