Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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