Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Randomize
