i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
