Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
17 Subtle Body Language Signs That Reveal A Lot About Someone
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.