singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
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