i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
Randomize
