I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
I got so drunk at the hockey game I bought everyone behind me in concession line a funnel cake.
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
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