why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question