you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Randomize
