Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?