Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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