I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
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