You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
