omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
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