is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
