it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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