it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
Randomize
