i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
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