oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
Hippo gnu deer
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
I party with great urgency now.
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