Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Randomize
