For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
I have a burn on my hand, I'm covered in bruises, I think my toe is broken, and I have no clothes to wear home.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize