tell your sister to shave her snatch
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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