Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
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