My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
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