honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Randomize
