that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
He? As in you personified your dick?
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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