She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Randomize
