So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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