If Rob Pattinson gets another fucking MTV award, I'm going to vomit.
i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
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