your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Found your dick twin last night
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
You always have that cute deer in the headlights look. Thats what made showing you my penis for the first time so disconcerting.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Pooping to opera.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize
