where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
The bartender just legitimately thanked me for breaking the cycle of speed metal by playing mmmbop.
i don't think that has ever happened before in the history of man
NoShamevember. You game?
I just sneezed glitter I JUST SNEEZED G LITTER I j u st SneeZED GLIT TER I DO NOT HAVE TIME FOR THIS AT ALL.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Randomize
