she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
Randomize
