Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
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