on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
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