I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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