I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Randomize
