my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Randomize