If immigrants and dwarves find love, why can't I?
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
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A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
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Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.