I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
well you can't waste a boner
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
