Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.

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  (678): Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth. http://tfl.nu/d54p
  Replies (9) Good night (3684) Bad night (1261)
• Favorite

  (719): View more from Colorado

  Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true

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  (719): Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true http://tfl.nu/xhyv
  Replies (20) Good night (4853) Bad night (815)
• Favorite

  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?

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  (603): he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float? http://tfl.nu/0v16
  Replies (21) Good night (1030) Bad night (5318)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.

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  (303): you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson. http://tfl.nu/oqx8
  Replies (10) Good night (3343) Bad night (788)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.

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  (614): mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her. http://tfl.nu/npv7
  Replies (6) Good night (1153) Bad night (3130)
• Favorite

  (302): View more from Delaware

  didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official

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  (302): didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official http://tfl.nu/mdan
  Replies (15) Good night (4785) Bad night (1228)
• Favorite

  (910): View more from North Carolina

  You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.

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  (910): You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear. http://tfl.nu/21wf
  Replies (3) Good night (1093) Bad night (2846)
• Favorite

  (219): View more from Indiana

  No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.

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  (219): No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone. http://tfl.nu/5xs9
  Replies (7) Good night (2146) Bad night (950)
• Favorite

  (515): View more from Iowa

  Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.

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  (515): Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad. http://tfl.nu/2fcz
  Replies (7) Good night (2465) Bad night (647)
• Favorite

  (407): View more from Florida

  How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?

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  (407): How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong? http://tfl.nu/4ez3
  Replies (12) Good night (1281) Bad night (543)
• Favorite

  (514): View more from Quebec

  MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'

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  (514): MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.' http://tfl.nu/5zwe
  Replies (7) Good night (1895) Bad night (591)
• Favorite

  (706): View more from Georgia

  It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?

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  (706): It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from? http://tfl.nu/d0ez
  Replies (7) Good night (1312) Bad night (465)
• Favorite

  (709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

  He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.

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  (709): He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes. http://tfl.nu/6yst
  Replies (6) Good night (759) Bad night (891)
• Favorite

  (912): View more from Georgia

  If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.

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  (912): If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight. http://tfl.nu/iyrl
  Replies (2) Good night (914) Bad night (548)
• Favorite

  (574): View more from Indiana

  When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE

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  (574): When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE http://tfl.nu/ak6a
  Replies (5) Good night (1039) Bad night (340)

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