This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.