The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
My underwear smells like fireworks.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink