Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
Randomize
