Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(847): View more from Illinois

this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way

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(612): View more from Minnesota

life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.

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(208): View more from Idaho

My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.

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(303): View more from Colorado

there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'

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(409): View more from Texas

just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome

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(250): View more from British Columbia

well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.

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(313): View more from Michigan

Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.

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(281): View more from Texas

I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.

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(818): View more from California

It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.

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