Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Im sitting on the floor of the hotel room eating nachos and drinking coffee. People should learn to embrace their hangovers
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