about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
They can be so fun, drunk bruises are like clues to the treasure of what actually happened last night. "why do I have a bruise on my belly button? oh right. i was trying to turn my stomach off so I would stop throwing up."
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
WHO JUST REMOVED THAT SAME BOARD IN TWO MINUTES FLAT WITH NO INJURIES, SHOES, SOCKS, OR BRA?! THIS BITCH. CRACKIN A BEER FOR DA SHOWA. BITCHES AIN'T SHIT MOTHAFUCKA
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
Randomize
