I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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