are you still at the devil's house?
Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
pop tarts are not kleenex
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
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